I can’t tell you how difficult it was to bring you this review. In case my super subtle title has eluded you, I’ll be talking about the restaurant Ninja today, located in NYC. Briefly, I had a great time and the whole experience was quite enjoyable, but my review isn’t 100% glowing. This of course presents a problem. One must be… tactful when discussing something that may be perceived as a… possible minor imperfection when speaking about trained killers such as ninjas. You see, they are quick to anger and will kill without remorse. Somehow, the Ninjas in question found out about my first few drafts and they… expressed their displeasure. They showed me the error of my ways and I agreed to revise certain… more inflammatory sections. I hope this meets with their approval and they will stop breaking into my room at night and stabbing me. Without further ado, here is my belated review of Ninja:
One time, at band camp work, I gave a bunch of good restaurant recommendations. One of my friends was all like “You’ve given us some great recommendations! We’re coming to you whenever we’re going out to eat.” Because I don’t always think things through, I decided to create a website where I can review local (LI/NY at the time) restaurants. Also I am a fatty, hence the name of the site.
That was how it started. I am notoriously lazy and didn’t update more than once or twice a year, if that. There were some dark times, but I am setting off on a renewed venture (Narrator: he stalled almost as soon as he started up again) to bring you not only food reviews from wherever I am stuffing my face (I’ve been to CA and back to NY!), but also infinite beer reviews, because who doesn’t like beer?
Communists, that’s who.
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